• PSA from Our Editor

    Written by:

    Hi my lovely readers,

    It’s such an awful feeling, whether you’ve been in the writing business for a long time or you’re just a few months into writing your first blog, when you receive a comment on a post that makes your heart sink because somebody totally misunderstood what you were trying to do. I infuse pieces of my personal life in this blog when it’s relevant, but this is not my full time job – it’s a total labor of love. Late nights after work, weekends spent on my computer. This is something that I do because I’m passionate about this town, and I love to write, and write about it. I started this blog out of a love for Hoboken and a lack of a female voice in our community, and I hope that I’ve brought that to our little mile square. I’ve met so many amazing business owners and wonderful people through it, and my life wouldn’t be the same without this town.

    Behind all of these posts, whether written by my contributors or myself, is an editor, who happens to be me.  Although I don’t always have the time to respond to all of your comments, I read all of them and they usually make me smile with your positivity and love for local businesses and Hoboken in general. Isn’t that what is so great about living here, almost all of us share that common ground of having great pride for this little city.

    I just wanted to share a comment that was left on a recent post {our Best of Guide} which I felt needed to be addressed in a public response, since they were slandering several local business’ interactions with me. While I normally do not highlight negativity on this forum, I thought this was a perfect place to address these offensive remarks and set the record straight. I understand we’re in the day in age that it’s so easy to type or text anything that comes into our head, but I’m hoping this is something we can all learn from, myself included.

    We received this comment from someone named “Gigi” {I’m assuming the name was fake since their email is gigi@gmail.com}. Here it is:


    Let me start out by saying I use to be a big fan of Hoboken Girl blog. I thought it was a great way to find new places in our lovely town. However, this blog has now become an excuse for the editor to get free goods and services for her and to promote her friends businesses (quite shamelessly). This list is my final tipping point. I was a close follower of this blog and it appears the majority of vendors on this list provided the editor with FREE services for her wedding in exchange for a positive write up. Honestly, these are not valid recommendations – rather, they are an excuse for the editor to collect as many free services for her and friends as possible and trick all of us into paying for it as patrons.

    – Rebellations – contently featured on the blog – gives free blow outs to the staff and one of the stylists is best friends with the editor.
    – EC Beauty Studio – Didn’t the editor get all her pre-wedding facials here? I’m sure at NO cost to her…
    – AMA makeup academy – Also mentioned in all her wedding posts…
    – Aarraa – The editors good friend seems to be the stores in house stylist – Coincidence?
    – Turtle Club – Didn’t she hold her bridal shower here?

    This girl is nothing but a cheapskate and is not interested in bettering Hoboken or our local business, like she would love all of us to believe. I suggest you stop reading this blog, like a plan to starting today.

    MY RESPONSE:

    Hi “Gigi”,

    I wanted to first start off by saying “Thank You” for being such a loyal reader. Normally I don’t respond to people who don’t have all of the facts, but since you’re slandering my name and reputation and are being very, very offensive, I figure I’ll respond and set the record very, very straight.

    First off, just as an FYI, when a post is sponsored (aka a business has paid for us to write or given services for free in exchange for a positive write-up, it is mentioned in the post at the bottom as SPONSORED). That’s a pretty normal tactic in the editing and writing world and if we didn’t, it’d be a big problem.

    None of the above vendors gave me anything for free to be promoted in any of my write-ups about my wedding or the best of guide. In fact, I’ll publicly state right here for all of the world [and the businesses to see!] how much they cost me.

    EC Beauty Studio: Erica’s facials usually run me from $80 (when there’s a special or she tries to offer me a discount since I’ve referred so many people to her since starting my visits with her – her peels and oxygen facials are amazing!) to $150, $200-$250 on a day when she or Dilcia (one of the other facial estheticians) encourages me to buy products. One of my friends even bought me a $200 gift certificate for EC Beauty for my bridal shower, so that was great to use when I was getting monthly (read: expensive) facials before my wedding! But, as I have stated in my posts – this is worth it to me and THAT is why I share it.

    Rebellations: The stylist you’re mentioning is a great friend of mine (who I met by chance while she was doing my hair 4-5 years ago – a friend recommended the salon she was working at at the time!), and since then I’ve referred a zillion clients to her, but only because she is THE BEST. Literally. I have girls who have never dyed their hair before going to her and emailing me that she’s changed their “hair” lives. She has not paid me anything to write about her or given me free services in exchange for a write-up; while as my friend who sometimes does my hair at my house, she does try to not charge me sometimes, but I always end up paying in some form – I usually tip her $100-200 per session regardless of the session price. Feel free to ask her next time you roll through the salon (since you seem to know so much about her!). Also, she did my hair and all of my bridesmaids hair for my wedding (which I paid for – for all of the girls as part of their gift) and was written a nice big check (by me) for her services. Because even friends won’t constantly work for free. Would you?

    AMA Makeup Academy: Guess how much money I spent on my wedding makeup? $400 for me ($300 for the bride and $100 for the makeup team’s transport). My bridesmaids paid for themselves – $100/bridesmaid, but I paid $100 for my mom and my MOH additionally, AND I paid for the trial makeup which was $100 to just do a test run of my wedding day makeup. To me, it’s totally worth the money. Jules and her team are honestly the best makeup artists around, and I’m so glad I found them this year via an Instagram search. Stunning work.

    Aaraa: I have been shopping at Aaraa for years, before I even met the in-house stylist several years ago (who started there last year). The fact that Aaraa is the best accessories boutique around is a total coincidence — really, can you tell me a better accessories boutique in town with affordable prices? Didn’t think so.

    Turtle Club: I absolutely held my bridal shower here. And here’s where it gets sticky – you’re now offending my mother. BIG no no. She paid thousands of dollars to have my bridal shower at the Turtle Club, and I enjoyed it so much that I wrote a blog post about it. That is what my blog/Hoboken Girl is about – it started as a documentation of my chronicles in Hoboken, and, because of readers like you, turned into something more with active and amazing contributors and followers. I have nothing to hide, and while there are perks from time to time being a blogger (really, ask any blogger or magazine writer you follow or subscribe to), the truth of the matter is that I do not often get many things for free. Again, when I do and am asked to write a positive post about it, it is mentioned, or if there is a payment involved, sponsored is written at the bottom.

    I want to thank you for taking the time to really scrutinize what you think is going on here – and for getting me fired up enough to write this all up and set the record straight!  Have a lovely day 🙂


     

    I know this post is not at all the tone I set for this blog, but I think I would be encouraging people to spread hate if I just glazed over this comment that clearly was false and totally upset me. So I thank you so much for taking the time to read – I know I’m not alone in this. If you own a blog or online business with an open forum, I’d be interested to hear from you about how you handle negativity. Usually it doesn’t get me, but today it left me feeling utterly disappointed not just for the way this has struck a chord with me, but also for the businesses we nominated with careful thought.

     

    ~Jen


    Written by:

    Jen is the founder and Editor-in-Chief of Hoboken Girl. She started the site to discover and share the wealth of things happening in Hudson County. Her roots in the area extend to her maternal grandparents, who owned two textile factories in Weehawken and North Bergen. When not planning the next Hoboken Girl event/volunteer project or editing her life away, she can usually be found shopping at local boutiques, eating an Insta-worthy meal, walking her French bulldog + rescue pup, or watching the latest murder doc on Netflix with her husband.


    18 comments

    • Jen – it’s really really awful that people have such hatred, negativity and jealously in their hearts that they feel the need to post such nasty things, especially on a blog that’s entire purpose is to HELP. There’s this ridiculous sense of power that anonymous posters have.

      As a blogger, I’ve received comments like this numerous times and every time, it hurts a little more – because it’s not true and it tends to attack who we are as people (because no, we’re not robots.) No one has any idea the effort, time and sacrifice that it takes to run a blog like this and I think it was smart of you to set the record straight. It was actually enlightening to be honest and now I’m thinking of going to Rebellations to get my hair done, hahaha!

      Keep doing what you’re doing, keep being a positive light and guess what – once you have haters, you’ve made it!!

      Happy holidays, hope to see you in Jersey City/Hoboken sometime soon 🙂

      Love,
      The Girl That Would Love to Smack Gigi Straight Across the Cheek

      Reply
    • Hi. Thanks for your PSA. I have been reading your blog for a year or two now, and even though I’m a middle-age stay-at-home-mom (yikes! that sounds so lame) here in Hoboken, I enjoy it a lot. I find your blog and website very informative, and even though I consider myself to be pretty knowledgeable about Hoboken (been here almost 20 years), I sometimes get an introduction to something “Hoboken” that I did not already know. I hate when people are mean-spirited and nasty about stuff like your blog — it’s someone’s CHOICE to read your blog, and if someone does not like what you’re saying or promoting, then that someone should get rid of the bookmark on his/her computer and move on. Life is too short to post nasty comments. Have a great day, and keep on blogging!

      Reply
    • I think what “Gigi” also fails to realize is that it shouldn’t be a surprise that you would use the best places in Hoboken for your wedding! Why would you use anything less for one of the most important days of your lives? So it should be no surprise, relationship or not with the owners, that these places would also make your “best of” list. And I’m sure there are plenty of other places you love in town that didn’t make the list this year too!

      Reply
    • Jen,

      Regardless of this one negative comment, your blog is something I look forward to reading weekly. I appreciate you doing it 🙂

      And as a PR professional, totally hear everything you are saying. There certainly can be bloggers/editors that take advance of the system, but I very much appreciate your honest reviews and recommendations.

      Have a wonderful holiday season!
      Britt

      Reply
    • I feel for you, Jen. I manage social media for my company and constantly get lots of negative comments from trolls, such as gigi. I do have you to thank for introducing me to Mint Market, Dina’s spray tans, Green Pear Cafe and countless other great spots in Hoboken, as I’m sure many others who read your blog do as well!

      Reply
    • Thanks for posting this! I’ve read your blog for years and love your suggestions & recommendations. I’m getting married next fall and I’ve enjoyed your bridal-themed posts! She’s crazy for publicly bashing you – you handled the situation with grace and maturity – so be proud of that! Don’t let her get you down. 🙂
      -Jenn

      Reply
    • Congrats Jen, this just means you are relevant! So here come the haters (sadly).

      You run a successful business with very loyal readers — this fact will rub insecure people the wrong way and you handled it perfectly. Keep up the great work, we all look forward to your posts. Gigi will find someone else to harass soon anyway…. ; )

      Reply
    • Ignore ignore ignore! Feel great about yourself…when you and those around you are successful …. you WILL have haters.
      And let her know when you first started that YOU promoted local businesses For FREE!!!

      Reply
    • Jen has been to my store dozens of times to get airbrush tans, body wraps, and her makeup done. Never once has she asked me for anything free. She is hands down one of the nicest people ever, and it’s so upsetting that one woman is bashing another smart business woman and trying to bring her down. We’re supposed to support each other! “If you don’t have anything nice to say…”

      You’re a wonderful person, Jen. Having a hater means you’re doing something right and unfortunately these things happen. Love ya!

      Reply
    • Adding to the positivity – I found your blog 1.5 years ago when I made the move from NYC to Hoboken and I can’t even count the number of things/places I’ve learned about from the blog.

      Keep on keeping Hoboken girls happy Hoboken Girl!!

      Reply
    • Hi Jen,

      I love your blog and I’m so bummed you and some of the best businesses in Hoboken were part of this negativity. I personally found EC Beauty through your blog and worked with Erica for my wedding. My skin was flawless! So many compliments! Love your recommendations!

      Thanks for your posts – keep em coming!
      Erin

      Reply
    • Hi, this is Isabella -owner of Green Pear Cafe’ and I would like to add how genuinely surprised I was when Jen wrote an article on us after visiting Green Pear Cafe’ at her own expense. The article was so thoughtful, written by detail oriented person . It felt to me like she really analyzed our menu, tasted each bite and sip, finally expressed herself in a most supportive way for which I am very Thankful. I never paid for this enormous gift and hurts to hear that people like Jen are being accused of something completely false. Writing is not my strength because English is not my mother language, but I felt I had to join the line of business owners who are very Thankful for Hoboken Girl’s tireless enthusiasm and hard work. Being opened only four months we made it on her top list, we have loyal customers from the other end of the town because of her support. Fighting the franchise giants in food industry and otherwise I can just tell you that we need Jen to spread the word about us – small business owners and create hope for more jobs in our strong and tight community

      Reply
    • Jen – you’re a fraud. Plain and simple. Fraud is five letters. F. R. A. U. D.

      And if you don’t have the nipples to post this, it will get released elsewhere. We have a lot of dirt on your tactics. More than you realize. You will want to move out of Hoboken when we’re done with you. And how have you been sleeping lately? Does going to bed as a super fraud make you happy?

      Word is out. Businesses get no benefit from Hoboken Girl. Shit. On a stick.

      Time for Jen to retire. Stop trying to be an honest blogger. Have babies and move the hell away from our city. Rubbish!

      Reply

    Leave a Reply

    Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *